“Reflect on where these past 30 days have taken you. What has it provided you? How did it affect you?”-La
Let me preface this quote with an explanation. For the month of November I chose to embark on a 30 day sabbatical with a friend. S/o to La!! She said that it was time to do some shadow work(working on the parts of self that we often reject or repress, a large part of our authentic self). Based on where I was mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally….I couldn’t agree more.
What better way to reflect than by completing my final assignment here. First off, sis is tired, and earned EVERYTHING she learned from this journey. Throughout this course I could hear “Bag Lady” by Erykah Badu replay in my head. Hearing vividly as Erykah belts out “I guess nobody ever told you, all you must hold on to?” What I soon realized was I had been holding one too many bags, to the point they were beginning to dig into my flesh. Of course this is metaphorical , but seriously, I was holding onto so many things that no longer served me. Relationships. Traumas. Circumstances. Memories. So much so that it was draining me. It was taking me further away from where I wanted to be. I was allowing a lifetime of mental clutter, physical trauma, and quite frankly my bs hinder my growth. But thankfully I made the decision to do something about it.
So how do you fix a problem you’ve had a lifetime? You acknowledge it, you address the things that trigger/cause it, you replace the behaviors/energies tied to it, you reclaim your power, and then you apply all you’ve learned EVERY day. Yes every day. No matter how healed you are life is an ongoing classroom and lesson.
What I’ve learned in this 30 days of reflection is…..My opportunities are limitless. I am far stronger than I’ve ever given myself credit for. I am worthy of love and someone is worthy of all the love I have to offer. I am only limited by the limitations I place on myself and I’m no longer going to do that. I’m not ok in a lot of areas in life(I lost my brother suddenly this year and lost my mind….I’ll share more on both soon in my blogs) and it’s absolutely ok. I am flawed, but perfectly so. All those things make me….ME. I don’t have to ask permission to be my authentic self. Those that are meant to continue this journey with me will accept me and stay. Comparison is the thief of joy. Procrastination was stifling my growth and had to go! “Let it go let it go LET IT GO!”
Whewwww! It’s safe to say I learned a lot in my break. I vow to take each lesson with me as I move along in life. I vow to view the world as a kid again…full of opportunities and places to dance like no one is watching. Even me doing this blog is a part of this experience. I am forever grateful for it all. I think that is enough. I’m out!
Love and light,